Fiction: Dear Neighbor
Dear Neighbor,
We are your new neighbor across the street. We have many alias, most of which, aren't even being used. If you happen to enter our garden without knowing at least one of our names, you might be trapped there until after lunch when our gardener, Mr. M, remembers to check the yard and the little creatures that lives inside the trees that often bites uninvited visitors.
If you happen to find yourself in the garden unexpectedly, make sure you walk the path between the little rivers that starts at the back door of the kitchen and ends at the giant oak tree. Don't go walking down the path with the glowing lights. It may look pleasant but it leads to a terrible drop at the end. You may very well end up at the bottom of a deep hole that Mr. M had set up for trespassers. There may be unusual ghosts living in that hole. They often preach about serenity and how to get to hell without trying. Mr. M had informed us this as we do not want to experience it for ourselves. You may enjoy being down there but we do not recommend it.
This is all mapped out in the visitor's card which you will receive when you come to our house with your invite. If not, walk pass these walls and into madness. There is no known cure if you happened to get pricked by one of the many poisonous flowers or if you happen to eat one of the bright, colorful fruits from the many trees. Although you won't die from the flowers or the fruits, you will go mad and maybe think you are a dog or a cockroach. We are uncertain as it had only happened once and the man claimed he was a chihuahua from outer space. But we digress. We don't know why Mr. M have chosen to plant poisonous plants and trees but we do know, he is not someone we dare trifle with.
Dear neighbor, if you value your life, remember not to walk into our garden without an invitation. Nor our front garden as Mr. M have just informed us he will do more gardening out there. He said he was inspired by one of the other neighbors with the twin bulldogs at the front. But it's no consequence as he said he will not plant anything poisonous out front but he did warned us he will set up the fence that when touched by unwanted visitors, will make them crave for childish things if they do not ring the bell before stepping pass it.
So dear neighbor, once again, we plead to you to not come to us uninvited. In the second page, you will find your invitation to a housewarming party this weekend. Please send it back to us and we will officially invite you over to see our garden. And please make sure you wear proper shoes, none of those clogs or crocs or whatever they are called. We hate those. Well, Mr. M hates them the most. People who comes to us wearing those type of shoes will be send to the garden to walk the path with the glowing lights. You know what that does.
We hope to see you soon.
Sincerely,
Your new neighbor across the street.
